I hate people.
I’m trying to create a blog page for my rants because I’m hoping that Oprah notices my amazing ranting skills and I make it on her show before Charmaine…sorry Charmaine. Hey, maybe we can go on together since you’re in love with love** and I hate on people everyday. We can do a “good, bad and ugly” show…Oprah being the ugly! Oh snap! Just kidding Oprah, call me.
Anyways, I log on to http://www.blogger.com and try to create a site since it’s pretty much the most popular blog site out there, aaaand I’m a huge poser. So I get to the step where I have to choose a name, that’s easy dailyrant.blogspot.com. Wrong! Taken! As well as the following:
Dailyrants – last update – December 10, 2004
Thedailyrant – last update – August 14, 2001
Rantingrandy – last update – July 23, 2005
Randyrants – last update – October 10, 2006
Rantapalooza – last update – December 15, 2006
The list goes on and on…
All the people who own these names can suck it. To add insult to injury, all of them haven’t been updated in 3-8 years! Some just have one entry!!! ONE!!!!!1 F people!
Sursly, I encourage you to visit these sites and see how lame they are. Here’s a little excerpt from thedailyrant.blogspot.com:
“hello everyone, this is my first post….soon i will be posting alotta stuff, anything from sports to tv shows and music personalities……so keep watching..its too late here and i gotta be up early so ill post tommorow peace ”
Fast forward 8 years in to the future. Your blog still sucks. And I’m wondering what your definitions of “soon” and “tommorow” are…Because if it’s “never” then I guess you win. I’d hate to hear what your wedding vows will be like…assuming you’re not married yet…for obvious reasons.
The name I decided to go with is: therantbot.blogspot.com therantbot.wordpress.com…I mean, at least mine has a dancing robot!! Come on people! Why The Rant-Bot? Because I like ranting and robots are awesome, also I’m a ranting machine. Now please, no more obvious questions. Now I know what you’re thinking: “But Randy, I have facebook and I can already see all your rants…why would I want to visit another site just to read the same thing over again? No matter how awesome a dancing robot is”.
I’m glad you asked, faithful reader. For starters, this site is easier to access, no fumbling over pesky passwords which could take up to 2-5 seconds of typing. Folks, that’s time your fingers will be thanking you for, am I right?? Also, you will find EXCLUSIVE content like “I wonder…” Where I wonder about stuff, and things. But wait, there’s more! If you visit the site today, you will be treated to bonus content like, “A memo to…” Where I write memos to things…and stuff. Folks, you get all this exclusive content including the regular daily rants for the low low price of free!
Let’s see Billy Mays and that douche bag Sham-WOW guy beat THAT! Hey Sham-WOW guy, look at DEEZ NUTS! (That’s for you John and Adam)
**Please help Charmaine reach her goal to collect 1,000 personal (real life) love stories written by you (about you) by next February 14, 2010. Please keep your story to a maximum of 500 words. Your story will be anonymous, so feel free to change names/places/dates etc if you wish. If you have more than one story to share, you should be smiling because that is amazing.
Please send all your stories to email@example.com